I have finally emerged from the virtual black hole I have been calling home. I don't know why my enthusiasm to write was so stunted, maybe I felt like I didn't have anything important to say. But now that no one is probably going to read this, it doesn't really matter. Actually I have just been lazy and not feeling at the top of my game.
I just remembered something funny that happened this weekend. I had quite the "Amazonian" moment at my local Vons. I was casually perusing the produce section for some avocados in my flip-flops and sundress, when I was approached by an employee. Now, I say "approached," but it was more like hunted down. He was across the room stocking some tomatoes and felt the need to make a bee-line towards me. He was like a lion hunting his prey and before I knew it, he was upon me. Wide-eyed and mouth agape, he sidled up beside me. An important note to make is that as a tall girl- 5'11- I have grown accustomed to the idiotic questions and banter ("Duh, you must have played basketball" or "Garsh, are you a model?" or some other completely boneheaded statement that has nothing to do with me as a person!) that harangue a woman of my stature during introductions, however when a complete stranger comes up to me and begins making asinine remarks, it tends to really irritate me. So, as I am trying to choose an avocado worthy of my famous guacamole, this man, all 5'4 of him comes up to me and in a heavy Mexican accent asks, "Geez, how tall are you?! and you're not even wearing heels." He then embarks on a 5 minute rant about how tall I am and that I never have to wear high heels and how tall I am! Oy! I did my best to be civil and brush him off as soon as possible, but he just wouldn't let it go. I mean, I don't go up to short people and ask them how short they are and go on about how cute their little feet are, and I don't go up to really obese people and say, "Wow, you are so fat, how much do you weigh?" Why is it perfectly acceptable to oggle tall people? I understand that if you are "vertically challenged" and wish you were taller, you would envy a tall person. But I wish I had bigger boobs, that doesn't mean I go up to women with a nice rack and ask them their bra size and cop a feel! I guess I should take it as a compliment, but sometimes it makes me feel like a Ripley's Believe It or Not Attraction. So, power to the tall women and the short men who admire them! (But, hey Men, admire from a distance!)